#jokes

I like to hold the microphone cord like this, I pinch it together, then I let it go, then you hear a whole bunch of jokes at once. ↗

— Mitch Hedberg

#cord #go #hear #hold #i

I guess my idea of a good audience is one that's quiet and listens, but also that's alive: they respond, they're getting the jokes, they're with me. And that' s been happening. ↗

— Dan Hicks

#also #audience #been #getting #good

I think those that are holier-than-thou don't make jokes. They take themselves too seriously and Peeta doesn't take himself too seriously. This is what I believe in and I'm comfortable with that and I can make a joke here and there. ↗

— Josh Hutcherson

#comfortable #here #himself #i #i believe

A civil servant doesn't make jokes. ↗

— Eugene Ionesco

#civil servant #jokes #make #servant

I don't mind making jokes, but I don't want to look like one. ↗

— Marilyn Monroe

#jokes #like #look #making #mind

Vegas has the Whitman's Sampler of audiences. They come from all different places, so you have to do some crowd psychology. You have to find the heartbeat of the room. It doesn't shift my jokes, but it shifts my timing and my attention. ↗

— Hal Sparks

#audiences #come #crowd #different #different places

Because it's uncensored cable, I think we'll be able to do the kind of sketch comedy that really hasn't been seen before. We can actually finish jokes. ↗

— Aries Spears

#actually #because #been #before #cable

It is requisite for the relaxation of the mind that we make use, from time to time, of playful deeds and jokes. ↗

— Thomas Aquinas

#from time to time #jokes #make #mind #playful

I have 40 years of unpublished material, the ones they don't pick, and the reason I don't redraw them or use them again is that I like to use my brain every day and come up with new jokes. ↗

— Sergio Aragones

#brain #come #day #every #every day

One of my biggest problems with comedy was that I did not understand some of the jokes. ↗

— Desi Arnaz

#biggest problems #comedy #did #i #jokes