#median

I think the more the actor lets you know what he thinks of the character, the less the audience cares - like a comedian who laughs at his own jokes. ↗

— Neil LaBute

#audience #cares #character #comedian #his

Since 1994, unemployment rates are lower. Median household income is higher. A greater percentage of Americans are graduating from college. Home ownership rates are higher. And the violent crime rate has decreased. ↗

— Cliff Stearns

#crime #crime rate #decreased #graduating #greater

It seems like when I first started, people got into comedy because they wanted to be good comedians. ↗

— Wanda Sykes

#comedians #comedy #first #good #got

I get called all kinds of things - an investigative comedian, a comedian activist - I've lost track of what my job title is. ↗

— Mark Thomas

#called #comedian #get #i #investigative

Shamu and I have arrived safely in Costa Rica. He was stopped by airport security because he carries enough artillery in his pants pockets to construct a sawed-off shotgun. Evidently, he though we were headed to Iraq. ↗

— Chelsea Handler

#funny #humor #humorous #funny

Jeff: I understand you guys had a good day today? Peanut: Yes we had a great day! Jose: No we did not. Peanut: Yes Jose: No Peanut: Yes Jose: No Peanut: Yes Jose: No we did not have a good day. Peanut: Yes we hhhaad...a great frickin' day! What? Jeff: Did you have a good day? Peanut: Yes Jose: No Peanut: Shut up Jeff: A good day? Peanut: Yes Jose: No Peanut: Shut up Jeff: You're supposed to have taken him to the spa. Peanut: I took him to the spa! Jose: He put me in the vegetable steamer. Peanut: It's the same thing!!! ↗

— Jeff Dunham

#humor #jeff-dunham #jose-jalapeno-on-a-stick #peanut #humor

Inside was the second LP album of a comedian's performance before an audience. ↗

— Shelley Berman

#audience #before #comedian #inside #performance

That's why modern corporate movie making has become so laborious that comedians are kind of kicked out by 50. ↗

— Dana Carvey

#comedians #corporate #kicked #kind #laborious

The pressure to being a comedian is being funny, but I've given that up, so there is no pressure whatsoever. ↗

— Gilbert Gottfried

#being funny #comedian #funny #given #i

I'm a comedian, for God's sake. Viewers shouldn't trust me. And you know what? They're hip enough to know they shouldn't trust me. I'm just doing stand-up comedy. ↗

— Dennis Miller

#comedy #doing #enough #god #hip