Garrison Keillor

It's a shallow life that doesn't give a person a few scars. ↗

— Garrison Keillor

#give #life #person #scars #shallow

Cats are intended to teach us that not everything in nature has a function. ↗

— Garrison Keillor

#cats #everything #function #intended #nature

A girl in a bikini is like having a loaded pistol on your coffee table - There's nothing wrong with them, but it's hard to stop thinking about it. ↗

— Garrison Keillor

#bikini #coffee #coffee table #girl #hard

Nothing you do for children is ever wasted. They seem not to notice us, hovering, averting our eyes, and they seldom offer thanks, but what we do for them is never wasted. ↗

— Garrison Keillor

#children #ever #eyes #hovering #never

They say such nice things about people at their funerals that it makes me sad that I'm going to miss mine by just a few days. ↗

— Garrison Keillor

#days #few #funerals #going #i

A minister has to be able to read a clock. At noon, it's time to go home and turn up the pot roast and get the peas out of the freezer. ↗

— Garrison Keillor

#clock #freezer #get #go #go home

I'm not busy... a woman with three children under the age of 10 wouldn't think my schedule looked so busy. ↗

— Garrison Keillor

#busy #children #i #looked #schedule

Sometimes you have to look reality in the eye, and deny it. ↗

— Garrison Keillor

#eye #look #reality #sometimes #you

A good newspaper is never nearly good enough but a lousy newspaper is a joy forever. ↗

— Garrison Keillor

#forever #good #joy #lousy #nearly

I want to resume the life of a shy person. ↗

— Garrison Keillor

#life #person #resume #shy #shy person