#absurd

If I have to beat you up to keep you safe, that’s just what I’ll do. It’s this kind of regard for others that makes me believe I’d be a good politician. ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#awareness #bad #fight #good #oppression

Those who can make you believe absurdities, can make you commit atrocities. ↗

— Voltaire

#atheism #atrocities #barbarity #injustice #religion

The one thing I remember about Christmas was that my father used to take me out in a boat about ten miles offshore on Christmas Day, and I used to have to swim back. Extraordinary. It was a ritual. Mind you, that wasn't the hard part. The difficult bit was getting out of the sack. ↗

— John Cleese

#christmas

What have you been reading, The Gospel according to St. Bastard?! ↗

— Eddie Izzard

#gospel

I should go to Paris and jump off of the Eiffel Tower. If I took the Concorde, I could be dead three hours earlier. ↗

— Woody Allen

#paris

When I meet a European, the first thing I say is, “I’d much rather watch football than football.” But I’m just teasing them, and they know I’d really rather watch football than football.   ↗

— Jarod Kintz

#europe #european #football #soccer #absurd

There are some ideas so absurd that only an intellectual could believe them. ↗

— George Orwell

#absurd

Happiness and the absurd are two sons of the same earth. They are inseparable. ↗

— Albert Camus

#happiness #absurd

A man is an angel that has gone deranged. ↗

— Philip K. Dick

#absurd

If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends? ↗