Chris Rock

Who's judging American Idol? Paula Abdul? Paula Abdul judging a singing contest is like Christopher Reeve judging a dance contest! ↗

— Chris Rock

#american idol #christopher #christopher reeve #contest #dance

There are only three things women need in life: food, water, and compliments. ↗

— Chris Rock

#compliments #food #life #need #only

You can write a great country record and still be angry. Who's angrier than Toby Keith? He's angrier than the average 10 rappers. ↗

— Chris Rock

#average #country #great #great country #keith

Gun control? We need bullet control! I think every bullet should cost 5,000 dollars. Because if a bullet cost five thousand dollar, we wouldn't have any innocent bystanders. ↗

— Chris Rock

#because #bullet #control #cost #dollar

A man is only as faithful as his options. ↗

— Chris Rock

#his #man #only #options

If a woman tells you she's twenty and looks sixteen, she's twelve. If she tells you she's twenty-six and looks twenty-six, she's damn near fourty. ↗

— Chris Rock

#looks #near #she #sixteen #tells

Only married people understand you can be miserable and happy at the same time. ↗

— Chris Rock

#married #married people #miserable #only #people

You don't pay taxes - they take taxes. ↗

— Chris Rock

#pay #take #taxes #you

Every town has the same two malls: the one white people go to and the one white people used to go to. ↗

— Chris Rock

#go #malls #people #same #town

Gay people got a right to be as miserable as everybody else. ↗

— Chris Rock

#everybody #everybody else #gay #got #miserable