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George Carlin

Read through the most famous quotes from George Carlin




Some people see the glass half full. Others see it half empty. I see a glass that's twice as big as it needs to be.


— George Carlin


#need

Scratch any cynic and you will find a disappointed idealist.


— George Carlin


#disillusionment #idealism #disappointment

He - and if there is a God, I am convinced he is a he, because no woman could or would ever fuck things up this badly.


— George Carlin


#feminism #feminist #george-carlin #god #men-and-women

Atheism is a non-prophet organization.


— George Carlin


#organization

If it’s true that our species is alone in the universe, then I’d have to say the universe aimed rather low and settled for very little.


— George Carlin


#humor #humour #perspective #philosophie #humor

I have as much authority as the Pope. I just don’t have as many people who believe it.


— George Carlin


#religion #religion

Instead of warning pregnant women not to drink,I think female alcoholics ought to be told not to fuck


— George Carlin


#humor

How is it possible to have a civil war?


— George Carlin


#funny #humor #terminology #war #funny

I think the warning labels on alcoholic beverages are too bland. They should be more vivid. Here is one I would suggest: "Alcohol will turn you into the same asshole your father was.


— George Carlin


#funny #humor #laugh #warning-labels #funny

Isn’t it a bit unnerving that doctors call what they do “practice”?


— George Carlin


#medicine






About George Carlin

George Carlin Quotes




Did you know about George Carlin?

He was stationed at Barksdale Air Force Base in Bossier City Louisiana. Carlin continued doing HBO specials every year or every other year over the following decade and a half. After a poorly received set filled with dark.

The first of his 14 stand-up comedy specials for HBO was filmed in 1977. Supreme Court case F. His final HBO special It's Bad for Ya was filmed less than four months before his death.

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