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I can't tell if I'm a masochist because I like the pain in a sexual way or because I think I deserve it for being a horrible person in my own head. There is this guy I like and we have had sex a couple times, he's really awesome and super attractive, which makes me feel like I don't deserve him.
Whenever we get into it he is always asking "Is this okay?" and says things like, "Let me know if this is too much." I tell him I'll let him know.... but I don't think I ever would and I think maybe he knows that, because he hasn't really done anything super intense. He has pulled my hair a couple of times, spanked me... bitten me lightly.... but he could get away with so much more. I would let him beat the shit out of me if he just promised to love me. He wouldn't even have to be faithful and I would probably still want him around. I just don't want to be alone, but I don't want to be with someone who is unattractive either.
#depression #love #abuse #masochism #mental #health #lonelyness
I am a woman (20 yrs old) and I can't stop thinking about big boobs. I want to sleep with women and suck their big breasts. Women make me so horny. I have so many fantasies about being dominated by busty milfs. I can't help it.
I'm married to a bitch. She told me I couldn't care for our newborn daughter since I am a guy. She hired a nanny. 2 months later I realized the nanny was mean and fired her. I'm a stay home Dad. I have changed, fed and cared for her until school. And my wife has resented it since.
She questions everything I do. Is disrespectful. And lazy. An Unhealthy slob. I do most of the household work/chores. She Is disrespectful to my parents and doesn't like when I take our daughter to see my sister.
I am the breadwinner also and have made a very good living. She wants more. And a trip abroad. And. And. And......
The problem is we have enough to retire comfortably. But not after she wastes our assets. Lawyers. Agents. RealEstate taxes and commisions. CPA's., 401k penalties, firesale, Ect. Then spitting the rest will leave both of us unable to retire. Work till I drop.. I worked hard to retire. This sucks.
Splitting it is fine, she wants to go for my juggler, which will drain both of our retirement.
I just want to cry.
#divorce #retirement #hate #despair #wife #confession
I love acting out and getting myself into mental hospitals. It's just so fun, to make a big dramatic hooplah and get everyone's attention. It is the ultimate in real-life trolling. Yep, I'm nuts anyway, I just love exploiting those places for interesting company. Three squares a day, roof over your head, sure it gets boring, but I love the drama. I am such a pathetic attention whore and I do not care.
Also, I'd love to turn into a beautiful sissy transgender female, and become an adult film star so I can finally have all the validation and love a person could ever want. Yeah, I'm big-time BPD omega bio-male, so sue me! I reckon I am transgendered, in some way at least. Kisses
#bpd
My mom got anger with me for not bringing my swimsuit and made me go skinny dipping. I spent the rest of the afternoon naked in front of all the other kids. I was 10.
When I was about 12 years old I had this neighborhood girl who lived above us. She was about 10 years old. So anyways I was way into porn that time and I watched it like everyday and I masturbated atleast twice a day if I could. So one day this girls parents and my parents were going out for dinner and they kept her at our house. She was the innocent type. So I wanted to try and see if I could get to do something with her. So I showed her some porn and she seemed interested. I asked her if she wanted to see if what she saw was in fact a good feeling? She said let's try. At that time I was super excited. So I take her to the room and take her pants and underwear off and take mine off too. Then I told her to suck me off and when she did I came in like a few seconds. I wanted to eat her out so I put her on the bed and spread her legs and ate her small pussy. She said it felt nice. So after that I wanted to fuck her badly so I place my cock at her pussy and push it in. At first it hurt her alot but after a few pushes it was okay. There was very little blood and I came withing a few seconds maybe one minute or less. But that was the first and last time for us because we moved out from there.
I haven't told this to anyone, but when I was 15 my first sex was homosexual anal. I fucked my boy cousins ass one night while staying at his house overnight, he was 15 also. The next day we went to the basement behind some shelves. He had his pants down and bent over the back of an old couch, with Vaseline on his butt and a jar of it in my hand I was going to lube up my cock and them use my receptive cum bucket again. He was wanting it as bad as I wanted to give it. We got so involved we didn't hear his sister (14) come down stairs with some laundry. She came back and asked what we were doing, and he stood bolt upright pulled up his tidy whiteys then his jeans and walked out. I was there with a jar of Vaseline in my hand and a hard 7" thin cock sticking straight out.
Oh, were you guys doing what we all used to do when we were little? she asked. I replied yes. From the time we were about 9 till 11 all three of us, plus one neighbor girl formed a club and used to get naked and play with each other. My cousin used to do strips for me and her brother in her bedroom if no one was around. She would let us rub our little cocks against her butt, even trying to insert them, I fingered her pussy and it got real wet before she chickened out and left me hanging, but once she started developing tits and pussy hair she stopped it all. We tried and tried to get her to at least show us her tits and hairy pussy but she wouldn't.
Don't tell my brother how much hair I have or anything, and you can only stick it in my butt, don't you dare stick it in me in my front, she insisted. Then she bent down and told me to rub some of the Vaseline on her butt. I did, then put some on my cock and fucked her up her ass.
My first and second fuck, were my cousins, a brother and sister, both anal. I continued to fuck them both for about 3 years. Her, only anal and eventually oral and her brother only anal. I did manage to suck his cock to completion about 5 times during that time though. Finally; one time when I took her on a date, we went to our normal motel, and I held her down while I ate her pussy, she loved it. About a month later I was eating her, and spread her legs, pinched her D cup tits and holding her down stuck my cock into her pussy. I finally got my first piece of pussy. Dark, hairy pussy that bled a lot. I always heard it only bled a little when breaking her hymen, but from eating her out the hymen was pretty thick. It bled for about 3 days actually, didn't stop until I fucked her a few more times. She hated that I forced her to fuck and stopped seeing me for a while. Then came back and I had a nice steady piece of pussy, ass, and mouth, plus her brothers ass.
I am afraid to tell anyone I am lesbian. For years I have denied it, because I always second guess myself, and because I have never dated anyone I have just lied about it. I am stuck and miserable, my family already tries to shove God at me whenever they can. I am afraid of the reactions my friends would have. I feel so alone in this right now, I pretend to be interested in guys just so my family wont find out, because I know it'll all go to shit once they do. I am being judged by the people in my life that say who I am is disgusting, and they don't even know they are directing it at me. It fucking sucks, and I feel like lying is the only choice I have now.
#lies #lesbian #confession #family #friends #alone #fear #judgement
My son is now safely out of college, married with children. But when he was a youngster we had him in Scouts. One of the other fathers was also a single dad and we found ourselves doing things with our sons. And afterwards getting a beer and watching a game. One afternoon, the boys were both with their respective moms and we got together at his house to watch the Cowboys play the Redskins. Beer, chips, and fun. He slapped my thigh, I leaned back in the couch, he looked at me and there it was, our first kiss. It was awkward as they say, he was more embarrassed than I was. I grabbed his crotch and told him that we should do it properly, so we had a long hot kiss while I held his crotch in my hand.
I pulled his erection out of his pants and gave it the longest and wettest blowjob I could. It had been a long time for me and my hunger for his cock couldn't be satisfied. I told him I was a queer's queer, for me it was all about being the bottom. I could switch hit, but having a man on me is what I really wanted. He was knew to this, so I helped him line up, face to face, I told him I wanted to see his eyes when he came. He was hesitant at first, but once we got started his fuck instinct took over and he gave it to me. I rewarded him with a kiss, a long deliberate kiss on the lips.
I told him that the reason I got divorced was because my wife didn't want to fuck with me after I came home with a smile on my face. He got divorced because she was a bitch. But he learned, he learned that he really liked it, the kissing, the oral sex, and once he learned how to give oral he liked that too. We remained friends and lovers all the way until our boys got out of Scouts. We are still friends, but don't live in the same town anymore.
I am stuck in a sexless marriage and hate myself for it. I have had opportunity to cheat and offers from other women but turned them down because I'm in love with my wife. I contemplate divorce everyday but I stay for my kids. I hate myself for not having the strength to walk away.
#divorce #marriage #self #hate #resentment
What I am going to write now is so disgusting I am glad that no one knows you I am.
Do you know cake pops? Those lollipop-cakes on a stick?
I decided to make some of them and bring them to work. Bought the stuff I needed and got to work. I soon realized that my dough was one fluid mess and I was running out of time because I got the night shift and I still had to clean up everything and take a shower and stuff.
I then did something ... disgusting and disturbing, I got this idea while sitting on the pot. I decided to bake my excrements, make a stick on it and take it with me to work. So I did!
I even covered it with some icing.
Some of my colleagues ate it and had to puke. None of them knows what it really was, I told them maybe one of the eggs I used was spoiled. They believed me and I regret doing that in the first place.
#cake #pop #disgusting #excrements #bake #stick #work #confession
I....I once ate a pickle that had been on the floor for a staggering 16 seconds...
I know, I know...its bad, its REALLY fuckin bad. But I just had to get it off my chest, for a while at least...
I think that, no I KNOW that I later will experience the repercussions of my immistakably heretical doing...
I understand that mercy is beyond me...forgivness is lost, and redemption is nearly unreachable
My punishment is IMMINENT...and I have to accept that this herecy is an insurmountable flaw...
Im deeply sorry, sincerely Casual Satanist
So I'm 16 years old and have always fantasized about being with an older man. I don't know why I'm like this but it's something that excites me. I absolutely dislike guys my age and their immature ways, it just doesn't satisfy me at all. No one knows about this but I'm currently talking to a 24 year old guy who my older sisters knew in high school and now he's talking to me. It all started with a friend request and then he messaged me. He was definitely flirtatious with me and I knew exactly what was going on. I know people will say that he's just using me for one thing but I don't care, I just love doing this and fantasize all the time about us having sex. I'm not sure if it will happen but I hope one day it will while I'm still young. I sound really dumb and naive but this is just my confession about myself.
The last few months were really hard for me. I lost my job, my girlfriend dumped me and some of my friends turned their backs on me because they think I'm a total loser.
Some days ago I got totally wasted and emptied my whole stock of alcohol. As you may guess, I threw up. Not just once but several times. The entire apartment stank like hell.
The lady who rented the apartment to me sent me a written warning. She thought I had a party and several people puked.
I feel like I am surrendering, giving up, quitting, throwing in the towel. Or maybe I'm 'older'.
My father is one of those men. Ex career military, second career in law enforcement. Today's woman rejects men like that. No woman wants to be my mother, stomped on, door mat, home waitress, house maid. I swore I would never be that woman. I went to college to get a degree in something that stood out. Get a self supporting job, and along the way tell men and boys to fuck off.
Yesterday I cleaned house, did the laundry, fixed dinner, did the dishes. Skills my mother taught me. The guy, he went for a run, met up with two buddies to work on his car, got a burger then they came over to watch some rerun football game. That's when I was the household waitress. And I compared him to his buddies and congratulated myself on landing the best guy.
I don't plan on staying home after we get married, I plan to work. At least until we have kids. Oh, and this guy is ex Marine, he gets along with my Dad. The other guy I dated didn't make the grade.
I wish I would get really mad at my friends. They make me cross sometimes but we have never really gotten at each other. There are two reasons for this.
I kinda want the drama in my otherwise boring life but more importantly I want to tell them all the things I want without caring that I hurt their feelings. I will sometimes stay up at night thinking about how I would yell at them. I would never do it because I know I would insult them, but there is no other way other than to insult them and I wouldn't do that unless I were mad.
I'm a young and pretty girl but I bet that no one would have thought that I would have such a fetish. I'm attracted to the complete opposite of myself, old and ugly men. I also like the thought of being molested or gang raped by a group of old, disgusting and fat men while being called degrading things like slut and cum dump.
I am a 27 year old virgin guy with a huge foot fetish. I like heavy women with thick feet, specially ebonies and mature asian women. Ebony and Asian women have the best feet in the world. I really like thick feet with short toes and meaty heels. Juicy wrinkled soles are my weakness.
My Aunt is a big fat woman in her late 40s and has very meaty feet with short toes and bulging heels. Her size is US 8. I used to sleep at her home and sneak in her room at night. She is a heavy sleeper and I used to uncover her feet and jerk off to them. I used to cum on her flip flops, sandals and flats. Once I got so horny and took my kink to extreme level. I wore her bra and panty, put on her flip flops and walked around the house. Then I went to her room and put her undergarments off in front of her sleeping and cummed on her flip flops. I was too scared to do that because I was afraid that if she woke up and saw me naked and wanking in front of her, I'll be finished. I still did that and saw her walking in her flipflops I cummed on last night. That gave me an sense of satisfaction. I have really wanted to worship her feet but was too scared to do that because I did not want to get caught.
My fetish has made me do so many crazy things. My neighbour who is a very sexy milf with ultra sexy feet, used to keep her flipflops on her porch and when I saw that, I went so crazy. I used to steal her flip flops at night, rub them with my dick and put them back after cumming on them.
Once I cummed in a woman's flats while travelling on a bus. It was a long journey, I was sitting behind that woman. She was wearing red flats. I put my phone out and used the camera to see if she has her heels popped out of the flats. Her feet were out of the flats and she had her head tilted on the window. I assumed that she fell asleep while on the way. I quickly dragged one flat of hers towards me with my foot and covered my lap with my bag. I started jerking off, I was really scared to do that in public but luckily no one noticed as I was sitting on the very end of the bus. I exploded and filled her flat with my cum. I put it back just before getting off at my stop and that woman noticed that something sticky is inside her footwear. She started looking around but at time I had almost got off the bus.
I have fooled my female coworkers so many times and have got them to send pictures of their feet. There is skinny Indian girl in my office who leaves her footwear under her desk daily. I cum on her shoes every day after the office hours.
I know I am a pervert and get aroused by a non sexual thing. But I cannot stop it and the more I try the more I lose. I want someone to be as crazy as me and understand my needs. I want to stop doing all this and want to do all the stuff with one woman only.
In Feb. '14 I met a crossdresser, pulled eachothers pants down and she sprayed cum all over my cock, my chest, pants and car. I used her cum as lube, she opened her mouth to take mine and swallow it. I also sucked her cock one time
#sex #gay #experiment
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