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I need to apologize, for agonizing you because of my personal insecurities. You were always a good friend to me, not my best friend, but always there when called upon. Lately, I've been jealous of your achievements even though it is my weakness to not be as good as you. I've believed hurtful rumors about you but despite all of that, I can't help but adore the person you are. I want to talk, but I don't know where to start. It's hard to be on the wrong side and face you everyday without guilt killing a part of me. Wishing you the best of all worlds, girl.
I want to do a preventive penance. I promise to everyone who will get near my car to hurt, damage or destroy her, that I will kill him or her.
I am not a violent person but I won't let anything happen to my baby.
When it comes to my car, it's not funny anymore!
I’m basically an emotional crutch for my friend, pretty much the only one she has, but I’m pretty sure I’m going to kill myself soon. I just don’t know what to do, I don’t want to leave her alone and stranded with nobody to talk to anymore, but I don’t think my mind is going to let me stay here much longer. And the worst part is I’m doing everything right. I’ve been taking my meds, reaching out to people when I need them, ive been taking notice when I’m having irrational thoughts and putting a stop to them, I’ve been excersicing, boy howdy have I. Been excersicing, but I still hear screaming that isn’t there, I still feel like my room is closing in on me, I still feel like my mind is deteriorating...what am I doing wrong?
Im 19 and in the Air force my husband was not well one of the guys at work had Ben flirting with me then one day he grab my pussy I just stood there as he Sade dirty things to me my pussy was so wet I run to bathroom and Frick out . He saidy don't u come over after work . I told him I can't me and my husband share a car tell him to come with u my friend
Will keep him busy tell him we half to pick up some books u need so I Sade OK that day my husband pick me up and we went to his house . It was him and his roommate he ask my husband if he could show me the books he Sade sure and he Sade turn Music on . As soon as we went in his room he drop his pants I fell to my knees and started sucking his big black dick he pulled me up and took my pants off . I Sade no my husband my catch us he Sade my roommate knows what's up there on there way to store I bent over and he shoved it in I couldn't help but scream
He fuck me so hard and cum all in me I hurried got dress and my husband was pulling in I Sade let's go and he never new its Ben 4 years and I fuck all kinds black men
Okay. So me and my partner have been struggling quite a lot recently with arguing and things like that. Well we'd just had an argument and I'd stormed off and was sitting in my car thinking about how and why I'd not done so great in relationships before. So obviously, I sought feedback from my ex.
A bit of backstory, my ex broke up with me after 1.5 years of dating. It wasn't a great relationship, we argued a lot and broke up and got back together etc. Anyway. He had a gambling addiction that I found out about, he told me he'd stopped and been done with gambling for a year so I took him for a celebratory meal etc. Anyways, I find out about 6 months after it was all a lie and he'd been gambling behind my back and its why he never had money (he told me he was saving for a house). This led to me controlling his finances (he asked me to) and obviously started the strain on the relationship because of the lie and the constant lying on top of that.
He breaks up with me outside a pub at 12.30pm and never gave me an honest answer as to why things ended. So during this argument, I thought I need to know. So I reached out to him and was really nice and polite like hey hope you're well etc but why did you break up with me kind of thing...
I didn't expect a reply, but I got one. And he said that he was struggling at the time and it was intense etc but he couldn't think of a reason. Anyway, I left it a day (things have been resolved with my partner) and thought I'll just reply and say thanks, hope you're well, carry on getting help and hope the family is okay.
I send the message.
He's blocked me.
Why?
Cause he's the biggest time wasting individual who doesn't deserve a food word spoken about him who goes around, lying to everyone and everything and then running away from the situation.
I rlly want to talk to someone about it but I lied to my best mate and said I didn't text him and can't tell my partner cause it would hurt them. So here I am, silently fuming cause I didn't get the last word and wanting to just tell him once and for all to shove his over entitled head up his own arse.
#myex #seekingclosure #closure #ex #breakup #partner #confession
So I got curious into this dating chat site and talked to a lot of men. I've ended up chatting into someone, who was very nice, intelligent and a little naughty. We exchanged skype name and started chatting everyday. I remained private about my identity to him. the thing is, I am unhappily married and has kids. but talking to this stranger helped me escape from my doomed reality.
Today I placed a spoofed call (spoofmyphone.com) for the ex-girlfriend from my best buddy. So I simple changes the caller id, that is displayed, to the number from my buddy. Really cool... I hope they come into contact again.
I'll admit it: I'm human and I get so envious of others and how much is going on in their lives and I hate myself for it. I hate that I even have these feelings in the first place because my life is my own and I have made the choices I have made that have led me to today. No one else made them for me and for the most part, my life really isn't that bad. I don't need to have the biggest and the best house, job, car, etc... I've got somewhere to live, a nice enough car, a cat, plenty of wine and a decent job. What more should I want for besides someone to share my life with and maybe some actual friends? I'm working on it!
In the end it just feels like it's not enough when my sister comes over and I get so angry at myself because normally I like my life and who I am and it's not her fault that she makes me feel jealous and stupid. I should be the bigger person and just let this go but she seems to be a like a storm: something that just comes along with all it's thunder and lightning and their's nothing you can do to halt it's approach. It's a cycle and by the time she leaves or I leave every time we get together, I almost feel like I'm in physical pain from the press of holding my emotions in check. I always end up balling like a pathetic idiot just to release some of the tension. Often I have trouble breathing. It's almost like a panic attack is induced or something and I just don't get it.
To give you some background, my sister is two years younger than me and 20 kilos lighter. I'd probably say I am the prettier of the two of us even if I am overweight although she has a nicer smile and definitely knows how to dress. We grew up in a small town and I was the only farm girl in my year group with the other 9 girls being town girls. It was just two different worlds. I grew up liking the outdoors and using my imagination but the townies liked sitting around and gossiping about boys and clothes, etc. My sister on the other hand, had four other girls her age who grew up on farms and they all became fast friends. I went through school going from friend to friend and as a result, my social skills are somewhat lacking. Don't worry, that's not the case so much these days but I just don't get people like she does and despite trying to be a laid back person, I just seem to be so sensitive. I can't handle it when people let me down or don't live up to my expectations. It also doesn't help that we have so many of the same interests. We worked for similar companies, we both like reading, writing, art, cooking and sewing. I feel like I can never be an individual and I am too embarrassed to show any of my artwork to my family who scorned the fact that I like(d) manga & anime when I was younger and still do. I am the black sheep of the family and if my own parents and siblings judge me for my tastes so much then other people outside the family certainly will. However she likes country music which is still in the 'safe' category. She gets teased for being into it but she doesn't get scorned whereas a lot of people in Western society see an anime episode and just see it as a cartoon when many animes can be very violent and for adults only. I don't like them for being cartoons alright. I like then because I like entertainment. I'll watch/read almost anything but I particularly like anime because it is not as constrained as Western stories/cartoons. It mixes my two favourite mediums together after all: stories and art. But no, apparently I am childish and immature when I'd probably say I am MORE mature simply because I have broadened my horizons and I am interested in all sorts of areas.
Moving along: she met her future husband when she was 19 and that was it. She's married a lovely man in a beautiful ceremony and now she's six weeks out from having her first child. Her life isn't perfect by any means but she couldn't have asked for a more wonderful start. She lives in a brand new, enormous house on a massive farm. She's rich and she has horses, dogs, a cat, a big garden and an amazing car and she's only 25. There's no doubt about it: she knows what she wants in life and she gets it. Not only that, she's really pretty and can flirt like there's no tomorrow. She is a great conversationalist and always the centre of attention. She's confident and self assured. Guys are always hitting on her. She even told me that a workman from a neighbouring farm hit on her last week and she's married and 7 1/2 months pregnant!!! What the heck?!
It's no wonder I feel fat, frumpy and tongue tied when she's around. Our conversation largely consists of her and her life and her calling me a dag because apparently I have an odd sense of humour. So what if I'm quirky? So what if I haven't had a boyfriend (and god knows if I ever will since my flirting skills suck so much - I'm shy alright! That doesn't mean I won't say yes if you ask me! Why should I have to ask? Not all girls have to be confident because surely not all guys find that sexy?) We talk about her all the time and how great her sex life is and how much of a pain it is to be pregnant. You know some of us are terrified that we're going to end up alone and never have any children of our own! And if I dare complain about it's the same old, "well you just need to be more confident and flirt. Nothing will come to you if you don't put yourself out there." Yeah well I don't want to simper and fawn! I want to meet someone who will talk with me and make me feel comfortable. I am shy and I don't want to be rushed into something and expected to have sex on the first date. I don't like touching someone as a form of flirting because frankly I'd be a little alarmed if some guy did that to me the first time we met and started talking. She never asks me what's going on in my life and she's constantly making me feel like an idiot because she always has such a tremendously strong opinion that you doubt yourself and start believing that maybe she is right.
I don't like her freakin friend okay! (Something we argue about more than anything else) And I am effin' entitled to my opinion! She's a horrible person who has upset all the other friends in their social circle and my sister still can't see it. This person didn't come to the hen's night and on the wedding night, after I had given my speech, she decided to upstage me by doing her own speech. She tried to make it look like she wasn't getting up on her soap box by making the other two bridemaids get up there with her - one of which was quite drunk and going through some horrible family issues and all three of them made terrible speeches. And then, my sister blames the drunk one and says how dare she do that on my sister's wedding night instead of caring about how much her friend is hurting. I mean, who does that? Yes, your wedding is a very special day and your friends should leave their problems at home but life happens and I can't believe she can be so on the side of one friend (who everyone else hates) and so mad at another who has been a far longer friend and had a lot of things going on in her life and was dragged into making a speech that she never should have had to make.
In the end it is so humiliating to be jealous of her and I am trying so hard to be me and improve in my own way and I should be grateful to have advice from her (or so everyone and my conscious keeps telling me) but you know what? I don't freakin' want any of it!!! I don't want these feelings and I just want to be me. I want to be able to see her and not have a complete meltdown. Is that too much to ask for? I want to have a few of my own wins in life and I want to freakin do it myself! I don't need advice from someone who's basically got lucky. Yeah I admit I thought and probably still think I am smarter and more widely read than her. I admit that I did better in school than her and thought that I was always better than her and I freakin hate that I even thought that in the first place because I never thought I was that type of person. I hate myself and I hate that I do that as well and that I am so freakin hard on myself. I just wish my chaotic thoughts would take a backseat for a change and leave me the alone because you know what? Life is meant to be enjoyed and not endured and right now I just can't figure out how to enjoy it at all. I don't want to feel like I am struggling because I want to feel like I am being challenged and I want to enjoy the journey instead of constantly feeling exhausted by my feelings.
#jealous #sister #friends #sad #upset #panic #attack #meltdown #envious #envy #my #life #hate #myself
I miss my ddlg relationship so much I don’t think I can love anymore else again but every time I’m with him I hate myself because of things he brings up whenever we weren’t even together.
I really like my ex. He was my first boyfriend and I can't stop thinking about how funny, cute, and nice he was to me. He broke up with me because of long distance (We live in the same city, and just go to different schools). It's been 3 months. He's had over 4 other girls. I still like him, but just want to be friends. Any advice.
#firstboyfriend #ex #missingex #crushing #likemyex #hopingtobefriends
I laughed about Amy Winehouse. Just found out about an hour ago that she's dead.
Oops.
#amy #winehouse #dead #laugh #confession
My girlfriend and I really enjoy having a few tokes, getting a good buzz on and then fucking like rabid animals. She loves to be dominated, tied up, held down, choked, anal, etc.... you get the idea. She wasn’t always like this, I slowly introduced her to some toys and it took off from there. Now I add a new element that I am not even sure she is aware of. Since the hot weather arrived I like to have the windows open in the evening to help cool the house (no a/c as I see no sense where I live at it gets nice and cool at night).
Now I have been leaving the blinds up with the window open and fucking her good and hard every time she stays over. I love in a neighborhood of single family houses and I am certain that several of the neighbours who have adjoining backyards can see us and definitely hear us. Last night I was “punishing” her by whipping her ass with her favourite flogger. I am certain the sound travels well over to my neighbours yards. I then will still have her bent over the edge of the bed and give her a good fucking. The reason I am certain neighbours can see us is that there have been times I look out my bedroom window and can see stuff going on in their kitchens and stuff. It’s even better when it starts getting dark and I turn on the nightstand light, that way I know people can most likely see us.
It really gets me off knowing one of my neighbours might be watching me pound my girl’s ass and pussy.
Now, the question remains, should I tell her this or should I say nothing and act normal? Something tells me that she might be on to my little game though and is enjoying it as much as I am.
I am just happy to have a little submissive slut who will do anything I want.
I have a bad tendency to get violent when I'm angry and I'm scared of my self I forget who I am and what I'm doing and I blank out and don't remember anything unless I'm told what I have done and tbh it scares me not knowing what I do when I lose it I feel like I should be in a mental asylum I hate myself for getting violent
I have had an obsession with pregnant tummies ever since I was 11 years old, it happened when my mom was pregnant at the time she was 33, she'd always had the habit of leaving the door open whenever she'd changed her clothes, so seeing her in her panties and bra at the time had given me boners in my no fly underwear. Not long after I'd turned 11, my mom's tummy had started getting swollen and she had soon started wearing stretchy panties with her bras, which had come up a lot higher over her ever swelling tummy, that had given me a huge arousal in my teeny tight bathing suit, sometimes they were called speedos. By the time my mom had become 7 months pregnant, I had gotten a big boner in my tiny jean shorts, as she had worn her bikini bra and big short shorts, what a body my mom had, even while pregnant. I could tell that she had loved showing off her tummy, even at the time she had been pregnant.
Hey I'm 12 (female)and I tried to kill myself by Drinking Bleach... Why u ask well I had to poop so I did. I didn't realize that there wasn't any toilet paper. I was solo mad and I asked my Brothers and sister to go see if there was anymore in the other bathroom. NOPE THERE WASN'T. so the told me to use a fricking SOCK (a white sock) I said no. So sat there for a while then BOOM my siblings busted the Door open and watched me yell and scream at them. So I looked on the counter and seen some bleach I opened the top . Then I thought to myself I could go to hell if I killed myself . so I closed the top. And wiped my ass. And eventually use the sock. AND THAT WAS I THINK WHEN I WAS LIKE 5 OR 6 and my family won't EVER LIVE IT DOWN YEARSSS LATER
I have a girlfriend. And I love her. But before her, there was someone else. We never really got anywhere worth writing home about, this other girl. She was in a difficult place at the time. So we just flirted, kept up a certain level of sexual tension, while still keeping each other at arm's length. It was, strangely, fun. Let's call her Mary.
Then, I started dating the girl that would be my girlfriend. She was hard to get and even harder to read. A real spitfire who'd never let me get away with anything. Everyone she meant would say that there’s something about her that just leaves you enthralled but you just don't know what exactly. It's something. Call her Amy.
Things hit off with Amy. It was a rocky start being who she is but it got somewhere nice, somewhere serious.
But early on with Amy, Mary and I kept texting and kept interacting on social media. We would comment on each other's photos how hot we thought the other was. Amy didn't mind. Mary was a friend, after all. In the DMs, Mary always talked about how we should get some coffee sometime; how we should maybe get a drink. Just us. She knew about Amy, though. We talked about Amy sometimes, so she knew.
The plans for coffee or drinks never went anywhere. I just kept saying, "Yeah. Maybe."
It didn't go anywhere until one day, it did.
Amy was out of town. And Mary dropped a selfie on my DMs saying she in a cafe downtown alone. I thought about for a while. Then I hopped on my car and went for it. "What harm could some coffee do?" I thought at the time.
I got there and we talked. She talked about med school and I talked about my own shit. It was, in a word, surreal. Then she asked me to walk her to the toilet. It was up some stairs and away from prying eyes. Before she went in she gave me a hug and, out of habit and shock, I hugged her back. My heart was racing. She pulled back and held my face in her hands, then wrapped them around the back of my neck gently.
"You're an amazing guy, you know that?" She said, her face close to mine. She was, without a doubt, one of the most beautiful people I've ever known.
I smiled.
We stared at each other for a while, arms locked around each other. In any other situation, this is where I would go in for a kiss.
But no, I just said, "You should go in, Mary. I'll downstairs."
I don't know if it was guilt or something else. Maybe a part of me had finally decided to admit what my concious mind wouldn't: that I was cheating on Amy.
When she went in, I called up my bestfriend. I told him to call me in 10 mins with some fake emergency. He knew where I was and who I was with, so he agreed. No questions asked.
When Mary returned, we continued talking for a little bit before my bestfriend called. I left that cafe on the whim of some fake emergency that afternoon. Despite that, I was one of the best non-date dates I've ever had.
A few days later, Mary stopped interacting with me on social media. No likes, no comments. She stopped the DMs and when I would try, she would respond but only to be respectful, I felt like.
And so eventually, I stopped.
A few weeks had passed and I got a DM out of the blue from Mary. I remember I had just woken up that summer day when I got it.
"I meant what I said. You're an amazing guy. Wish you the best. Take care of yourself."
I never responded. I didn't know how to. I didn't know what it meant.
That was three years ago. I don't see Mary anymore. I don't speak to her, whether in person or online. But sometimes, during the late nights, I think about that day in the cafe and about what that message, that seemed too much like a goodbye, meant.
Amy, to this day, doesn't know about it. And I've never done anything like that since. We're happier than we've ever been now and things are going great.
Mary hasn't dated anyone since, I don't think. But I see her online, looking happy and still in med school.
I'm writing this now because it's been three years. All that time and I still think about Mary.
I have a crush on Megan Whessels a.k.a The Fanfic Critic on youtube.
I wanna cum on her fat face cause she has a double chin and that was in 2014, I do hope she's gotten even fatter since.
Seriously I would love to smell her armpits after a long hot day.
#bad #sex #megan #wessels #ugly #fat #youtube #fanficiton #i #hate #myself #for #thinking #this
I have been battling with pornography ..i am a virgin but i get horny a lot of times.
#i #am #a #virgin #but #get #horny #lot #of #have #been #battling #with #pornography #and #its #getting #the #best #ofmyself
There's a boy in my secondary school who is absolutely gorgeous, with green eyes and brown hair. I've been obsessed with him for over a year. I feel embarrassed to tell anyone, even my two best friends, because I'm a black female with short hair and a wide nose, and I'm quite chubby, so why would a boy like him go for a girl like me? Even worse, there is chemistry between him and my curvy Asian friend, who has long silky black hair and is gorgeous. No matter how much I try to beautify myself, I still look like a big ugly lump.
In 1982 I enlisted in the US Army and immediately went AWOL. I spent a couple weeks filling out docs and taking tests. When the big day came, I rode a bus with several other recruits up to the regional recruitment center I finished signing everything and swore the oath in a room with maybe 50 other recruits. We were put on new buses, but I grew so nervous that when our bus made a stop I joined the latrine queue. Then I simply went out the back door and ran. I hid out a few days before going home. I guess the Army wasn't interested in me afterwards because no one ever came for me. 40 years later I am still ashamed of my cowardly behavior.
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