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Read the best #funny confession stories
As a child, I occasionally went to my neighbours on the evening and turned on the light of their car. It was a very old one, so it was never locked.
The next day I waited for the fight which would occur. She insulted him because he had let the lights on - again.
Hihihi.
One time in school, some kid left his computer on during lunch break. Without hesitation, I searched up “furry hentai”, found the worst image I could find, and made it his desktop background. I also hid several other pictures in various folders just for the hell of it.
#funny #joke #computer #background
I have an interest to go online and look at pictures of dead people. Then I like to laugh at them. The dead bodies dont disterb me, even when their organs or blood is exposed. I'm not sorry holocaust victims and dead people but I guess I should be...
I live in a multi story building with many foreign families and a lot of them have some kind of trouble with the police, distrainors, lawyers and other creditors. When I'm at home, I often hear that there's someone who keeps ringing the door bell, to talk to one of those families. Apart from me, almost no one of these people work, they are sitting at home all day and watch TV and therefore they know who's standing in front of the door and therefore don't open it. But I'm a helpful person so I let them in by pressing the buzzer for the front door down stairs. It's funny to watch the police while they are trying to get entrance to the flat.
#building #foreign #families #funny #police #lawyers #confession
Embarrassing story. When I was 19 I was hooking up with a girl at a house party in college. She was 18, chubby, and samoan so she was very thick. She was even taller than me. Her thighs and ass were thick but felt firm. Her lips were big and I just imagined them giving me head. We were in somebodies bedroom and we went on the floor instead of the bed for some reason. We started just making out. Felt amazing. I just felt up on her boobs and ass. She was grinding on me with cloths on and I just came. I couldn’t help it I tried but it was so hot I just finished in my pants. I didn’t want her to know so I begged her to let me eat her out. She wanted sex but I was able to convince her to let me give her head. For 10 minutes I just licked her and ate her out. Tasted her and finally she finished in my mouth. I was happy because she was apologizing saying she tried to hold off so we could fuck but I made her cum. Luckily we met up a few weeks later and had sex but even then I only lasted like 40 seconds before cumming inside her awkwardly. Haven’t seen her in years or spoken to her but she turned me into a bbw lover.
I want to do a preventive penance. I promise to everyone who will get near my car to hurt, damage or destroy her, that I will kill him or her.
I am not a violent person but I won't let anything happen to my baby.
When it comes to my car, it's not funny anymore!
Every time my sister is bitchy or annoying, I spit on her pillow.
It satisfies me to know that she sleeps on that pillow without knowing anything.
Is anyone fart in ur tuition class or burp😂 I have done I think this is embarrassing don’t uh?
#embarresed #funny #lol
I enjoy the sorrow, misery and pain of others. It does not have to be anything crass, but I get giddy and really really gleeful if I watch someone struggling.
I ROARED with laughter when I watched a young mother lose her baby's pacifier in a drainpipe and the baby started crying.
When I am walking through town and occasionally stop and watch, hoping for something funny to happen - I love watching people struggling with heavy objects.
I love watching fail compilations on YouTube.
Unfortunately, I now read on the internet that this glee and joy for the pain of others might be connected to feelings of inferiority.
I confess that I worry that should be ashamed for my key source of joy in my life. And that I love my fellow human beings the most when they are stuck in a water slide.
#funny #despair #joy #glee #youtube #videos #fun #laughing #baby #mother #slide #water #confession #inferiority
As kids me and my brother always hid the poop of our dogs in the newspapers of our neighbours.
I change some of wikipedia's entries just to mess with people. Most of the facts and stuff I change stay like that.
I don't regret anything; it's you own fault when you believe everything which is written on wikipedia.
I once used my phone as a vibrator (no insertions of course) and didn't thought it was actually going to workjdsjdjs.
I try to make my boyfriend angry because he said proudly announced once that no one and nothing can make him upset.
It's my new challenge to show him otherwise. :-)
#angry #boyfriend #upset #challenge #proud #funny #confession
Today, I had to go to see a gynaecologist but before I went there, I washed myself 'down there' with a washrag which was lying around in the bathroom. Because I was already late I just whipped over and rushed to the my doctor. After a while, I was finally sitting on 'the chair' (ladies, you know what I am talking about) and the gynaecologist started laughing really really bad. Under laughter he tried to tell me something, after a while I was finally able to understand him. He told me that he hadn't needed to 'style' my vagina for him. I looked down and saw that it was covered in glitter.
I accidentally used the cloth my little daughter uses for painting and stuff...
At the birthday party of my little sister (it was her 7th birthday) I put vodka into the bowle so the kids get funnier.
#alcohol #vodka #birthday #party #sister #bowle #kids #funny
I am only able to fulfill my manly act if my girlfriend calls me "the machine".
#machine #manly #act #funny #confession
Every time I am bored I go to my local music shop and switch all the CDs and DVDs into other packagings.
I always had a fantasy of stripping in front of older women but I was to shy and scared. I used to stay nude mostly when my parents were out one day i decided to go out in my building corridor naked and locked the door in excitement of that. Thank god i had keys and it was afternoon so it suspect anybody around but before I could open the door the lady came from the front house came out and saw me naked with full erection. Fumbling and trying to explain why was I out like that and struggling to open my door with keys I anyhow got in and she never mentioned it to my parents but even today if she goes down with me in the lift I feel so embarrassed.
I got my little brother drunk. He's 16 years old and had some friends over, they had some beer with them and some tequila but none of them drank very much. When they left, I showed my brother what he could to with all the leftovers. I mixed him a very special cocktail, containing 4 cans of beer, half a glas of tequila and some vodka.
He drank all of it, we had some fun but then I sent him to bed.
The next morning the whole living room was covered in vomit. My brother had to clean up the mess; my luck was that he don't remember anything, so I denied giving him that much alcohol.
#alcohol #vodka #cocktail #drunk #vomit #funny #brother #confess
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