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I screwed up my relationship and it ended because I was too scared to tell the truth. Unknowingly to me at the time I was suffering from depression, I got myself into debt and I couldn’t get out of it. Instead of telling my partner I tried to deal with it myself. My partner had a temper, often wouldn’t speak to me for days or weeks on end if I had upset him even though I didn’t know what it was I had done wrong. He never asked me if I was ok, he never took any interest in me and I was constantly walking on eggshells. None of this excuses what I did. He started spending time away from me, told me he wasn’t happy with our relationship anymore and I think he had met someone else but would never admit it. I desperately wanted our relationship to work but it was too late. Several months later, we were still living together and he found out about my debt, I didn’t tell him but he found out and hit the roof. My heart was pounding so fast I thought I was going to die, he wouldn’t listen to me and it was the worst night of my entire life. I often have flashbacks to that night and even just writing about it makes me so anxious. I left our home the next day, our relationship was over. He told everyone we knew what I had done, people spat at me in the street and rightfully blamed me for everything. I lost everything, my home, possessions and a big part of myself that I will never get back. Years have now passed and he’s moved on with his life, met someone new and sold our home. I can’t move on. I hate myself so much, I can’t forgive myself for what I did and I know that I am a bad person. I haven’t rebuilt my life, I still have nothing and no home of my own. I have depression and I realise now that I have had it for a long time. I paid my debt off which should have been a big relief but it wasn’t, I desperately want my old life back and I know that I will never get it back and that is my punishment. People think that I have shown no remorse but I feel it every second of every day. I deserve to have a miserable life, I am scum.
I'm going to kill myself. I'm not sure when but I can feel my death stalking me every second of the day. I had a stroke at a pretty young age a few years ago. I didn't have any physical residual problems but emotionally I'm fried. I have a constant feeling of dread that lives deep in my gut, something that seems to be stuck inside my esophagus. Sometimes I feel ok, but thoughts of how I'm going to die are never far from my mind. I really want it to end.
I’m a minor and I’m transgender (FtM). I’ve been “out” to my family for a year, and to friends for about three years. I’m struggling so much, my mom doesn’t support me and says shes “doing it cause she loves me.” I hate to even think about it but a lot of the time I find myself thinking of suicide, or “DIY top surgery” (pretty much stabbing myself). The thoughts haunt me at night, I can’t sleep because I can’t stop the intrusive thoughts. I’m typing this at 2:44 am. As cheesy as it sounds I always knew I wasn’t a girl, and the first time I tried to kill my self I was 12. Then again at 13. And again at 15 etc. I can’t take hormones or do anything to further my transition, the only thing I’ve been able to do is cut my hair. Clothes wise, the only masculine clothes I have are my dead dad’s, and my room still looks the same as when I was 9 years old and sitting in here makes me just want to end it because I’ll never be in the right body.
Thanks for listening I guess? Sorry for how depressing this is.
#transgender #trans #ftm #transftm #minor #suicide #depression #selfharm
Hello all, I'm a Mid 30's married British Indian guy with a below average cock. My wife is gorgeous thick Indian woman size 14 38dd's and extremely vanilla! It's taken me years to get her into toys. the thought of another cock scares her! But I would love her to be a full size queen at the command of a real bull with a proper cock to satisfy her with. While I'm locked in chastity and humiliated. I think of all the fucked up shit I would have to do, get her ready to be fucked, bathing her shaving her getting her best lingerie ready that she only wears for a bull never for me... only for it to come back ruined after she has been used! Be their personal slave and errand boy obeying every humiliating command given. Guiding big dicks into her, lining them up before gaping her ass licking her pussy as she gets fucked, cleaning up her creampies. I fantasise about my humiliation, forced bi, only being able to fuck her using the bulls used condom, getting them to cum over my pillow ... work clothes etc. Watching them fuck and cumming over her wedding rings only to make her sick up all the cum!
I don't know why this turns me on so much but it does!
Is this normal??
#slave #humiliated #humiliation #wife #cuckold #husband #indian #british #degraded #used #abused #bull #sph #tiny
I'm chronically ill and the nausea from it is unbearable. It's so much worse than anything else. I can't concentrate on anything with it, I can't do anything properly, and no one understands it. I would rather be dead than feel this way for the rest of my life
#pain #despair #desperate #confession #ill
I'd always wanted too go to my old high school school (got bullied by students and teachers/ staff members) and kill at least 50 people if I couldn't kill them all.
While lighting off fireworks in the woods one misfired and hit a dry patch, going up in flames, too big to be out out. We hopped in a car and drove 20 min to the closest payphone and called 911 reporting it anonymously. The next day over 600 acres were burning.
Yesterday, I had to go to the dentist. But before I went there, I ate garlic bread with onions and paprika. It was great!
A few years ago when I was in my early 20ies, I had some serious troubles that I still notice today.
I was in a huge friend circle and we liked to party or generally hang out and relax. Most of them were my age, but some were a bit younger. The two youngest were two 16 year old girls and they were best friends. As I now know, one of them was totally and insanely in love with me. But she never told me or shown me, she was always kinda bitchy to me. I guess this was her way of showing me?
Anyway, one Friday night, we were all at a birthday party in a friend's house and those two were there as well. I actually can't remember what caused or triggered it (it must have been something rather trivial) when the girl that had been in love with me started acting up and blew the whole thing out of proportion and started screaming and crying at me. I remember that she called me a "stone-hearted asshole" that "does not care for other people's feelings". I never would have thought about myself in that light and I could have argued with her about it back then, but I thought I would just leave it at that and tried to ignore her as best as I could.
That seemed to spur her on more and I was told that she got completey wasted after I had gone home.
The next day, I woke up to dozens of angry and hateful text-messages from her and her best friend and they were threatening me and said that I would regret it and that I was an asshole and the like. I ignored the texts and even deleted them and that was the stupidest thing I could have done. Couple hours later, the police knocked on my door and arrested me. They told me that I had been accused of raping a girl.
As it turned out, those two bitches went to the police and told them that I had made her drunk and had sex with her without her consent. Her best friend acted as a witness.
After this, almost no one wanted anything to do with me. They all shunned me and labelled me as the "child fucker". Only one friend believed me.
Those two lied their asses off and (lucky for me) couldn't keep their stories straight and the examination of the "rape victim" had shown that she was still a virgin and definitely did not have sex with anyone the night before (as she said).
The case was dropped and I sued them. They only had to do some social work.
All of my friends still believed them and did not talk to me any longer.
I had to move to a different city, find a new job and start again from the bottom. With only one other person believing in me. I has been some years now and I am happy again, but this story still leaves a very sore taste in my motuh.
#confession #rape #allegation #untrue #lie #girls #destroyed #life #wtf
What Is My Wife Thinking?
Ive been married to Cindy for 10 years. We both had a previous long marriage and we were all friends. Cindy and i began chatting on line one night and it lasted all night. We ended up having an affair, divorced, and got married. It was not like either of us. She had been with her husband since she was 16, married him at 17, so her experiences were limited. But during our chats, we swapped nude photos. She had never taken or had anyone else take one, not had she seen another man naked.
Cindy is a VERY beautiful woman. She is 5'5", about 135 lbs, curvy, with 34DD (boob job after having 3 kids). She has a small waist, which makes her boobs look even larger. Over the years, i would playfully take photos of her as she was getting dressed, in the shower, etc. She would never cover up and a few times flashed a sexy pose. She would occsssionally say, you better delete those as soon as i took them, but most of the time she didn´t. Most of the photos seemed to be candid or suprised but obviously not without her knowigf they were taken. The times she posed, she would turn her head to sort of hide her face and close her eyes as if she was asleep.
A few years ago, i met up with my beat friend since high school after a gym visit. I hardly saw Mike or Angie (wife) even though they only lived about 20 miles from us. Mostly, our social life with friends was with Cindy's friends. I had told him about our vacation to Jamaica, and gave him my phone to look at the photos. I could not see the screen as we were facing each other at a small table. He seemed mighty interested in the photos, and i got up to order a beer and he seemed to panic trying to close a photo. I saw he had a nude photo of Cindy up zoomed in, which caused it to not close. I realized he had backed up out of the folder i had opened and opened another folder named "Other Jamaics Photos", which had about 50 nude or partially nude photos of Cindy in it. The one he had open was of her laying on her back ,,(from the side), but clearly showing her huge breasts and the tuft of hair she has down below. For some reason it excited me, and I allowed him to keep looking since he had already seen everything. He got brave enough to zoom in and comment on her boobs and her landing strip.
Over the next few months, while Cindy and I was having sex, i would talk dirty to her and say Mike saw her photos and loved her tits and the way she shaved. She thought it was just fantasy talk, but it was the truth. She would get super wet and would seem to get more excited. It made me wonder if it would turn her on.
A couple months go by and one day Mike texted me "I wish Angie was more like Cindy and let me take nude photos of her. She doesnt have the body Cindy does, but it would be a huge turn on.: i had texted him back "I'd like to see those if she ever does. It would make us even." I had left my phone on the dresser one night as i was showering and Cindy picked up my phone and saw the texts. She confronted me about it and i explained it was an accident. She was upset but calmed down quickly and all seemed fine. She seemed as upset i wanted to see Angie as she was Mark seeing her. Two weeks later, we were attending a book signing and Mike and Angie showed up. I was nervous Cindy would say something. Mike knew that Cindy knew about the texts, but she didnt know I told Mike she knew. They came walking up, and Cindy was super friendly to them. I was surprised she didnt act embarrassed in front of Mike. When we left that night, she said "I like Mike and Angie. We shoukd start hanging out with them some. Since then, we´ve been on several trips with them, and Cindy acts perfectly fine and very friendly.
My questions to you women are... Do you think Cindy thinks about Mike seeing her naked photos? Do you think she surpressed that somehow? It it possible she secretely is turned on around him knowing he saw them? Occassionally, she throws it up about my carelessness with the photos, but shes never asked which ones he saw, or if Ive deleted the ones I had. Part of me believes she is turned on by it, but knowing her, would NEVER admit that to me. By acting like she doesnt know or remember, it is like plausible deniability.
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Thoughts?
I outlived my expiration date. I fought to live until a major surgery. I survived. Then I almost died. There’s no way I should have lived. Then I guess I had Covid. I had no money or way to a hospital. I just lay in a floor alone for days barely getting water and a little food.
I did all of that just to find out no one wants to talk to me. Oh I have children. But no car that reach them. No money to live near them. They love me but a disease makes it impossible for me to see them.
I wonder why God doesn’t love me. I served Him my whole life, but He doesn’t care about me.
I get so confused. I called my hospital trying to sort things out. No one knew anything. Then some woman told me off about paying my bills. I don’t owe them any money. I was just trying to find a way to see someone for less money so I could afford to stay alive. She told me off. Said she has co pays with her insurance. Well sure. But she has a job. I can barely walk.
I was just trying to explain to them that I can’t afford to pay more money like they want me too That by limiting when I can see them I can’t walk over 100 miles.
When I was around 18 I met this girl and we had instant sexual chemistry. We tried to get into a relationship but it quickly became apparent that we would only work sexually. This girl was hornier than I have ever seen. What started as hours of phone sex every night turned into weekly and then even more regular hook ups which involved making out, and lots and lots of kinky hot sex, it all sorts of places. Her house, in a park, public toilets, even behind a delivery van while the driver made a delivery. This went on for 2/3 years and while this was going on she had a few relationships but we never stopped and the boyfriends never knew. We we're just 'close friends'. We actually had become really close friends who also were fuck buddys. Both of our sexual libido was sky high, we would fuck for hours and hours and do all sorts of positions and we would never tire. I would fuck her and then drop her off to her boyfriend and then pick her up once she had been on her date to fuck her again.
When I was around 21, so after 3 years I had a job out of town and we stopped talking so much and our lives drifted apart. She met this guy who was a virgin and started up a relationship with him, lucky guy. We would talk/meet up maybe once a month and hook up and when we did talk it was like nothing had changed and we would talk everyday. She would tell me everything about her boyfriend and their sex life, and we would reminisce about our marathons and all the roleplaying we did.
A couple of years passed and we drifted further apart and stopped seeing each other, and talking maybe upto 10 times a year. We still had chemistry and when we did talk it would go on for hours and we would always end up talking dirty.
4 years after she got with this guy they got engaged to get married. A few weeks before the wedding we were talking and she said she would no longer be talking to me anymore. We decided to meet up for one last time for old times sake and boy was it worth the while. We met at a hotel and I think we must have fucked for 6-7 hours.
At this point I had also got into a relationship and after a year and a half it had gotten quite serious.
Here's where it gets interesting, the girl I was going out went to university with my fuck buddy and they had been friends for the last 3 years! I had told my girlfriend I knew this girl and we had a bit of history but she doesn't know the extent of it or how much we both still craved each other.
I was invited to my lover's wedding and it was quite awkward. I could just picture her naked and imagining me doing all sorts of things with her on the stage and all over the hall.
Since then we have spoken a few times and again the conversations go on for hours, however we have not hooked up since she got married. We both have admitted we really want to and both admitted than neither of our sex lives are anything like they were with each other but we both love our partners very much.
We know we will never have relationship its just sex. I know we will probably have an opportunity soon and I can wait to fuck her brains out.
I feel guilty but my feelings to be intimate and very overpowering compared to the guilty feelings.
Someone tried to walk right beside we without having been vax. And with no mask. The duo started mocking people who get the vax. So I started politely mocking people too afraid of the vax. They said the whole world should have waited 3-5 yrs for proper testing. So I said yeah millions of people having took it isn’t enough proof for morons. They’d rather the whole world die while they follow a few hundred test subjects. Those millions who are fine aren’t enough.
I told them I know someone who was like them. She wouldn’t vax or mask. So she gave it to her family. Now one is on life support and a few are dead. She needed a hospital but they gave her emergency new treatments & she barely lived. But now she’s always tired. Can’t taste or smell. Coughs a lot. But on the plus side she did get the vax & now wears a mask.
I told them that on the plus side. All these people dying who won’t vax are creating job opportunities. I know two people who had bad jobs. They listened to me. And because they would vax I work long hrs they have now been promoted. They now make great money. Great benefits. Will get a retirement. All because of others who wouldn’t vax. So those too afraid of a vax will leave a void when buried. Or by refusing the vax. Letting responsible people get ahead. Or they may just pull an oxygen tank around for life after surviving Covid. I know someone now doing that.
Two people who argued with me about Covid just buried relatives this month. They are worried about relatives in the hospital. They laughed for a year. On the plus side they finally vaccinated.
One of my relatives works in an over flower hospital. He says people come in begging for the vax. Tell him about their children that need them. The people they love. They beg for the vax. Then they die. And another anti vaxer takes their place begging for the vax but it’s too late.
I told those people some of these stories. But I said at least the funeral homes are making a lot of money.
Well these two people weren’t laughing anymore. They looked freighted. They decided they needed to leave the store. Go look for a place that might have the vax.
I may have saved their lives. So that was mean of me. But with good intentions.
Then I went back outside and got in the car with my good looking date. She got her vax when she could. Whew. She’s so good looking. But the rest of my date is too hot to share. I’m glad I’m vaccinated. I like having hot dates. I want to keep doing it for years. She loves that I’m vaccinated.
I've always been an A+ student. Not once did I get a B, not even an A-. Funny story; one time my teacher entered in the wrong grade and told me about it and how I thought I got an F in the class, even though it was a mistake, I started crying my eyes out. I didn't forgive myself when I showed up late to class or turned in a homework assignment 5 minutes late. That's not why I'm writing this confession. I cheat, a lot. I am a university student with perfect grades, and the only way I can get those grades is if I cheat. I will not pass the test, even if I studied day and night for it if I don't cheat on it. That started during my second semester in college and ever since, I've been lazy and discouraged and have no will or reason to continue on with school. The thing is, I know it's wrong, and even if I ever get caught, I will not care whatsoever. But I can't stop myself. I've violeted my trust in myself. My family's and friends' trust in me. The dean of the school and all my professors who have congratulated me on my excellence.
#mistrust #cheating #plagiarism #college #student #professors #work
I don't think this is a sin or anything (more like a rant) but a lot of people have been commenting about my weight. Please note that if you tell people that they're underweight, it hurts just as much as if you were telling them that they're fat. My body is perfectly balanced and I can't do anything to change how I look. Stop telling me to eat more and "You are so underweight!". It makes me feel horrible. Just one comment makes me want to throw up. Please just stop commenting on other people's weight or the way they look. Everyone is different and should not feel ashamed of their body.
When I reserved out of a parking space I accidentally drove into another car. There were a lot of witnesses, so I got out of my car, took a piece of paper and wrote something like "Sorry, I drove against your car. There are many people watching me, so I am writing this letter as an excuse. My bad, Jim!"
Actually, my name is Joe.
A few days ago I went climbing with an old friend, I hadn't really spoken to him for at-least a year, so it was nice to catch up.
The journey to the climbing centre wasn't bad we just caught up and he told me about his recent break-up, etc. Once we started climbing things started to become sexual, he would stand at the bottom and watch me climb whilst making comments about my ass and how 'flexible' I was. But at the time I didn't really think much of it, I have had friends in the past be sexual/flirty but that was just a part of their personalities.
Anyway climbing was so much fun and it was great catching up, it wasn't until I got home that I realized that he was never sexual or so forward like that in the past (we used to be semi-close friends). So that did weird me out but I ignored it.
Later on that night he texted me saying that he missed me, this made me feel both happy and awkward because it sounded like we had a past (which we didn't). I just played it off and said that he obviously missed my humour and jokes I'd make. That's when he said that he liked seeing my ass in those tight shorts and that whilst we were changing (they had shared changing areas) that he wanted to have his way with me, and that next time we go climbing he'd like to climb me instead! This made me feel really awkward but also got me wet, knowing that this guy wanted to fuck me.
Ever since I have been stuck between ignoring him or telling him I want to fuck him but not have a relationship with him. The thing is, is that I'm still a virgin (18F) and I'm not sure that that's the way I'd want to lose it. I guess there is plenty of time to decide.
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