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As I kid I thought you impregnant a woman when you marry her. I was totally afraid of getting married or attending to a wedding party. One time, I was around 11, my aunt married and at her party, she sat on a chair and the people carried her around and I was just so terrified that they would hurt her and her new baby. I ran to the dance floor, screaming and shouting that they should stop because they would kill the baby.
It was so embarrassing. Everyone was laughing at me.
#impregnant #marry #afraid #baby #pregnant #marriage #wedding
When I was a kid I would watch Wrestling and laugh seeing Wrestlers hit eachother with chairs and cookie pans, and it gave me and my friends at School the idea of making a Backyard Wrestling league and we would hit eachother with just about anything but the weapon we mostly used was VHS Tapes.
When one of my friends hit another friend in the head with a VHS Tape I would yell "He Hit Him With a Video."
Believe me getting hit in the head with a video hurts because I remember asking myself "What would happen if I hit someone in the head with a video?" My smartass cousin would respond with "If you hit someone with a video then they will die."
So I hit my Cousin in the head with a Power Rangers VHS Tape and I got in trouble for hitting my cousin in the head with a video. But later on my Cousin hit me in the Dead with a Pokemon VHS Tape and it fucking hurt I ended up with a headache after me and my cousin both hit eachother in the heads with VHS Video Tapes.
In School one time me and this guy named Kevin got into a fight and he threw a book at me and I took a video that I brought to class (just in case) and Hit Kevin in the head with a video and the video smashed into pieces and as a result of me bashing a VHS tape on Kevin's head; I ended up getting suspended from School.
One time at Blockbuster Video some asshole tried to take the video I wanted to rent Pokemon The First Movie so I argued with him and picked up a Blockbuster video box from behind a display copy of The Barney Movie and hit this asshole in the head with a Blockbuster Video and after that I was banned from Blockbuster.
AS the years went on VHS was replaced by DVDs and now Blurays and they are less effective as weapons, I graduated from School, and Blockbuster went out of business.
I haven't hit anyone in the head with a video since VHS Tapes were replaced by DVDs but not too long ago I picked up some old VHS Tapes and brought them with me to work and my coworker Kevin started pissing me off so I hit him in the head with a Video while yelling "HE HIT HIM WITH A VIDEO." and then I got fired but before I left I threw coffee in his fat face and hit my former boss in the head with a VHS and smashed it to pieces and I feel so redeemed.
Don't fuck with the Videomaster.
I just hate all of my friends they all act like they are something big but they just go quiet in public they hide better than my feelings and they do whatever they want they dont thing abt anyone's feelings but themselves i always try to get out but i like just cannnt they are very toxic i cant do this anymore i wish i can just leave and never look back but i will see them every single day the hell.
I've been in deep depression for...well, it's been so long I forget. My family has now began to put it aside and I'm starting to be the neglected forgotten child in the house. My sister's kid has started to take my place. My father and I rarely talk anymore. Just the other day he refused to look at me once. The desire to just kill myself gets stronger every day. The pain of self harm starts to feel calming now. The pray that when I fall sleep, I never wake up. I keep a tab open of fastest ways to kill myself. I hate the fact I have to deal with this reality. I just want it to end....so bad. I've hurt myself to many times and no one has cared anymore. I've written so many suicide notes. I'm broken.
I am an orphan. I was one when my parents died so I always lived with my aunt and uncle. They were my only family but it didn't feel like other families I knew. When I came out as bisexual to them they said it was just a phase and I would get over it. It made me feel like shit and it drew an even bigger gap in my relationship with my aunt and uncle. I was going out with this guy and one day we decided to take it to my place. No one was home so I guided him to my ant and uncle's room. We fucked like crazy on their bed and we came all over their bed, multiple times. To this day I don't think they know but they fact I do makes me happy and turned on
So my Ex just changed his Instagram screen name to “African American Girls Only” 1. That’s Racist 2. I’m white 💁 so I guess I never happened?
I'm an neurotic and difficult-to-handle person but somehow I managed it to get a boyfriend. I like him, a lot, but I'm such an insecure and broken person and that makes it difficult for me to show him how I truly feel. I really would like to tell him what bothers me and that he should treat me differently.
I have a tough past and this is demonstrated by fear of loss. As soon as he is not with me I am a total wreck and I feel jealous that he's spending time for example with his friends and has a great time, even without me.
I also would love if he integrated me more, so take me with him to his friends. But I'm just too insecure to tell him so.
And then I do stupid things just to hurt him, even if he doesn't find out about it. Just to make me feel better. Last week, I met with someone I know he doesn't want me to meet with while he was out meeting some friends.
I confess that I'm a jealous bitch without self-confidence.
Every time I tell someone I like them, I start getting anxiety and start crying, even when they haven't said anything. This has caused people whom I liked to reject me, then I break down even more. I believe this all rooted from my first love.
My first love...I'll call him Jay. We were in kindergarten together and here is where I first recognised what the phrase 'crazy in love' was. We were pretty much inseparable, but more like he just didn't have a choice. I was the clingiest 5 year old in the world. I would rarely ever separate from him other than to go to sleep, go to the bathroom, or travel.
Flash forward about 3 years.
I am absolutely CRAZY about him and the way I show my affection is very strange--I hit him and kick him--so much that he goes to school with bruises.
Flash forward again 3 years.
I realise my how unhealthy I truly am. I start having severe anxiety and breakdowns. I decide to confess my infatuation with Jay. I tell him about my feelings and he responds "I know, but I really don't like you. You always hit me." He then walks away. Even 4 years after that, we still aren't separated. I am still in love with Jay, but I manage to keep it under control. At this time I think I am a sophomore in High school. For these past years he had tried to avoid me and eventually he succeeded, but now he tries to have conversations with me and be affectionate. So, now I'M the one who is avoiding him. This almost 10 year crush is speaking to me after 4 years of not speaking at all. I decide to take an exchange program to China and all of my friends are freaking out and telling the whole school.
........Jay is in the program too........
These 'coincidences' mustn't just be in my head.... right?
I love him, but I'm tired of being patient and accepting his moody whims and anxiety driven doubts. Sometimes I want to scream at him "grow the fuck up!" But instead I calm myself and busy myself with cleaning or go do something alone to breathe through my frustration and anger.
He's in his mid-30s and a divorced father, so I expect him to be a bit more mature than he is, but maybe that's my problem. We are the same age and it's frustrating that he hasn't learned how to be more responsible and take more initiative.
He seems incapable of moving forward and making decisions about his future, which is largely because he endlessly feels stuck by his kids and hopeless about the future.
We are adults, it's time to stop crying over the spoiled milk and make the most of the life we have, which is pretty amazing actually. He backed out of marriage and now he wants to back out of living together, but still claims to love me and want to be only with me. Truth is, if I move out to "give him time" to get his shit together, I already have my eye on another guy who can warm my bed for me. I hate being alone. I hate living alone. I have feeling alone. If he can't understand that after everything we've been through, then he doesn't really know anything about me. I love him more than I have ever loved anyone I didn't give birth to, but I'm tired of being the after thought. I'd like to be someone's priority for a change because I always prioritize the person I'm with.
I'm so fucking angry I want to scream. Why do men have to be so fucking selfish!? Even the good ones have a sense of entitlement that because I'm a woman I'll pick up their mess and help them take care of their kids because they're in over their head. Then they take advantage of me, like I'm nothing special for taking care of them and theirs.
I got a lot of love to give and I spoil my man as much as I can, so what gives? Why is it fine for me to take my man out for his birthday and he can't even write my name on a store bought card let alone take me out to dinner!?! I'm gone for a WEEK and I come back and the house is destroyed. He leaves for 4 days and comes back to a clean house. I go out for groceries, I bring back stuff he likes. I make little things to remind him I love him and show him I'm his. I don't yell or complain or whine or bring up crap that's done and over with. I never get jealous or pressure him for more time. I'm a really great girlfriend, actually. I don't spend his money or expect him to buy me things. I don't mess with his stuff or make our life about me. I love his family and remember important dates, I take care of his kids and try to be fun and supportive and loving and happy. When something goes wrong, I shrug it off and keep moving forward. I hold him when he's hurting and celebrate when he's excited about something. What else am I supposed to do? I never deny him sex and we have a great sex life. I cuddle him and give him attention all the time, flirting or being playful, teasing and just being warm and kind. If he needs space, I'm happy to give him space and go do my own thing. But if I want to go out, it's usually he wants to stay home. I'll be the third or fifth wheel with my friends because he just wants to stay home.
I know I deserve to be treated better, but I don't know if I believe such a man exists. My boyfriend is the best guy I've ever met, even all this bullshit included, because I have known a lot of selfish assholes. I've loved addicts and mentally ill men. I've taken care of them as they cry on the toilet, shitting while they're high and depressed. I hold them as they sob ugly tears because they've cheated on me or found themselves in a bad place and they know they're hurting me - but I can't stand to see them so destroyed so I hold them and let them fall apart while I hush them and tell them it's going to be ok, that I still love them. Because I do still love them.
I want to cut out my own heart and light it on fire. I don't want to be swayed by men. I don't want to love my boyfriend so much that I put up with all his bullshit, waiting for him to figure it out because he's been at a disadvantage for so long. I am so weary of this fucking life. I can't be anything but nice. It's not in me to bitch at people or be mean. I don't want to hurt anyone. I just want someone to love me and think I'm special with as much excitement and effort as I put into my love and admiration of them. Even steven. Is that really too much to ask?
I have been hiding behind a thick mask for as long as I can remember, I guess I'll always be an insecure person.
When I was moving to secondary school I had plenty of friends and was always the centre of attention but as soon as I moved to secondary I started to fade away like nobody notice me so at the time I thought it would be a great idea to fake my depression/suicidal thoughts to get attention I would post on social media about how I wanted to die and that nobody cared about me anymore. And it worked I was getting a lot of attention and I loved it until my childhood best friend who meant a lot to me went and told my parents I know she was only doing it to protect me but the only reason I stated doing this so she would give me more attention, I felt like shit my parents asked me why I was posting this stuff and I couldn’t tell them the real reason because I was to embarrassed and I thought they would hate me for it so I just told them that I was being bullied. I said that I was being picked on by 4 boys which I kinda was but it was only inside jokes they would call me 4 eyes and pick on me put we always saw it as a joke so I just blamed it on that, and it worked my parents told the school about the boys and they were punished and I felt so bad I actually thought about killing myself but after all this my parents took me out of school to home school me this was the worst point of my life.
My best friend slowly drifted from me I was losing all my friends and I had no one left, my parents put me into therapy (it didn’t work because there was nothing to work on). A whole year goes by of me being home schooled I’m trapped indoors most of the time because my parents won’t let me go out and I couldn’t use social media anymore so I had no way of contacting my best friend, at this point my mental state started deteriorating I was going insane until I finally snapped and ran away. I wasn’t gone for long as I had no where to go but the first place I went to was to go see my best friend she lived quite close to me so it wasn’t really a problem so I went to go see her but she didn’t want to see me I was confused until I talked to another close friend of mine and released that the whole school knew I was faking my depression for attention my heart sank because I knew that everybody would hate me now and I would lose everyone. After all this I went home and my parents were talking to the police because they were scared that I was gonna try kill myself, when I got inside the house my parents told me that they are sending me to hospital to be put on suicidal watch i didn’t want to go but I had to while I was there I saw my phone in my mothers bag and I grabbed it to try msg my best friend and explain things but when I logged into Instagram I saw hate groups mate for me saying that I should actually kill myself I felt awful but what made me hate myself even more is the fact that my best friend had blocked me and sent me a message saying that she wanted nothing to do with me my heart sank. I had lost everything I had nothing left I just wanted the pain that I caused to end so I stood up and ran to the canteen, the canteen didn’t have anything sharp in it other than the knifes they were not to sharp to stop people from killing themselves but I made it work I grabbed one and ran to the toilets I quickly locked the door some of the nurses noticed what i was doing and tried kicking down the door, I tried slitting my throught with the knife but it wouldn’t go deep enough and by the time I managed to make the knife sharp enough they had already broken down the door I was taken away from there and put into a mental hospital where I have stayed for 4 years I don’t know what my ex friends are up to now but all I know is they don’t care about me anymore no one does and it’s all my fault I only wanted my best friend to show me more attention because deep down I loved her but I was to afraid to tell her.
Sorry about the really bad English and grammar I haven’t really learned much seeing as most of my time as been spent in this hell hole my hour on the phone is nearly up so I got to go but if I was to give you a life lesson do not fake mental illness for attention it completely fucked up my life and I don’t think i will ever be able to reedem myself goodbye
And Izzy if your reading this I’m sorry I always loved you but I was to afraid to say it maybe in another life I wouldn’t be so selfish and just puck up the corage to ask you out.
#depression #bestfriend #love #suicidal #suicide #attention #fake
Those who have Adhd,Asd are intelligent individuals these individuals could have gone higher. Look at the education systems & you you want to know why they assume they cant excell is due to the fact they look at thrm just like the rest of thee crippled & individuals who have impairments.those who have adhd & ASD have just as much a chance to ecell with the rest of those who havr no impairments. ADHD & ASD is a psychological condition. I advocating for those who had ADHD three of them one with a masters degree, one with a two year degree & one with a Bachelors.
I am a preschool teacher but I hate working with kids. Such little brats!
Throughout middle school/highschool I would take candid pictures and record girls feet. I don’t have a foot fetish myself but I know a bunch of people do so I would sell them online. There were times where I felt gross and uncomfortable doing so but then I thought about all the money I was making and I kept on doing it until I graduated.
I am a female, 16 yrs old.
I grew up always told to never fall in love, or be involved into relationships until you're ready for marriage.
Today, I found out that I am in love with a boy who grew up on the same way as mine, too.
I understand the situation, and the lesson behind it. But this really bothers my heart even on my sleep.
I don't know what to do. He says he likes me. But he says he don't want to disturb my studies, and he wanna stay away from me.
I hired a older widow (in her early 70's) to answer the phone in my shop so I am not constantly interrupted working.
Knowing her from previous business dealings with her late husband and selling off their equipment after his death we have some history.
She is quite spry and has a sharp tongue with unruly clients.
Some years ago I installed a hidden camera in the floor at the roped-off entrance and got some good up-skirt shots from female clients still wearing skirts.
Now I installed a hidden camera under the office desk the widow is occupying. Until now I only got granny panty shots. I am hoping the summer heat will force them off her.
I have to confess something that (for me) is very embarrassing and horrible and bad.
I am so afraid of black people at night. I don't know why, I don't know when it started. When I'm out at night and I see a black person, I almost freak and pass out. It's horrible.
The worst part about it you ask? I am a black person myself.
At the birthday party of my little sister (it was her 7th birthday) I put vodka into the bowle so the kids get funnier.
#alcohol #vodka #birthday #party #sister #bowle #kids #funny
I wish I was everything I’m not
I wish I was skinny
I wish I was pretty
I wish I was lighter
I wish I had friends
I wish I had a life
I wish I wasn’t alone
I wish my life was different
I wish I could switch bodies with someone else, this girl is the person my best friend ditched me for and now I’m just alone, all the things we used to do she does with her. I just don’t know if people can even see me
I am bisexual and I want to tell my family but my sister and mom always hate on people who are a part of lgbtq+ and it’s wrong my dad is fine with it. I don’t want to get kicked out of the house but if I say anything I will and I’m only 11 years old so yeah.
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