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I am an orphan. I was one when my parents died so I always lived with my aunt and uncle. They were my only family but it didn't feel like other families I knew. When I came out as bisexual to them they said it was just a phase and I would get over it. It made me feel like shit and it drew an even bigger gap in my relationship with my aunt and uncle. I was going out with this guy and one day we decided to take it to my place. No one was home so I guided him to my ant and uncle's room. We fucked like crazy on their bed and we came all over their bed, multiple times. To this day I don't think they know but they fact I do makes me happy and turned on
I have been hiding behind a thick mask for as long as I can remember, I guess I'll always be an insecure person.
I have a confession to make.
It's not about what I've done, but about what I'm going to do.
I want to leave my fiancé because it just doesn't work out anymore! We are planning our wedding at the moment and now I realize I don't love him as much as I told myself. He's not the right guy for me... not for the rest of my life anyway.
I met him in a café 2 and a half years ago. At first, I couldn't stand him but then, after we went out a few times, I started liking him.
The last months he's always so grumpy and lazy. He doesn't wanna go out with me, he just sits at home or plays poker with his buddies. And I don't wanna start talking about our non-existing sex life.
Our wedding should be in 2 weeks time and now I'm freaking out because I don't wanna marry!
I'm a 21 year old gay male. Decent looking.
Anyway this starts all the way back in elementary school, I always felt different. I was the odd kid out and often picked on but if you were to look at me there would be no obvious reason. I was clean, looked normal but I was always off, this is when the horrible pattern started. I had met this kid, let's call him Cody, anyway we hit it off at first when school started because he was the new kid and I was a loner and we bonded over just running around at recess because neither of us liked sports (or ever were invited to play) and the swing set. As the year went on I thought everything was fine and normal, his mom even started volunteering at the school to serve snacks for the students which had given me a chance to meet his mom which I thought was great until i got pulled into the office one day. I was told that I was being suspended for harassing another student, it turns out Jake was deeply afraid of me and my vivid imagination, so afraid that he had pretended to be my friend so he wouldn't get hurt. His mom volunteered at the school to even keep an eye on me so she can see for herself what was going on. That's when I really knew something was wrong with me and what sickens me is that this exact same pattern of me finding one person and developing a dangerous fixation on them, my intent is never to harm them but I do... never physically but I'm so insecure in everything about myself. I need to pick a fight with them just to know that they care enough to argue back. I make up a sad story or suicide attempt to see how much they love me. I constantly push these boundaries to test how much they will take and if they will hurl me out of their lives too. This pattern has slowed down but not in a healthy way, ive now turned to opiates to give me that feeling of euphoria I would get when someone would say something nice to me or give me a hug. I'm up to about 160-200 mg of oxycodone use a day which I guess is enough to kill someone without a tollerance and everyday I wish I wouldn't wake up from my nod. When this isn't enough I turn to casual sex on grindr just so I can still feel sexy and desired, I never use condoms because I hope I get HIV, that'll kill me in a few years if I don't treat it hopefully. Oh I should also mention that the only person that ever loved me unconditionally no matter how bad I got died of cancer when I was 19, the same time my "fiancé" left me. He was actually pretty good at dealing with my crazy, he knew how to work around it but after losing my mom I got really bad. Wanna know what's funny? I have a high paying job! I'm really smart and manipulative so I was able to cheat a resume and land a 30$ an hour job, I just pretended I knew what was going on lol I've even bought a car recently. I have this random peaks of energy and sanity I think where I set a goal and then I work hard to acheieve it, all while hiding a drug addiction. This isn't easy to do but any addict can tell you that they'll figure something out to push them through the day. As you can see this is so haphazardly written because this is how my brain works, I'm never on a single path and do you want to know the sickest thing that torments me the most in my life? I love. I love so hard. I love everyone and everything. All I want to do is love each and every person on this earth and i know that I have enough compassion in my heart to go around to each one of you but with my deadly desire to be desired like that in return all I do is hurt anyone who crosses my path. I've stopped now. I even got on methadone to start saving up a chunk of money for my family and entered the methadone clinic who dose me every morning before work, then I go to my office, milk the fuck out of the clock, go home, pop some xanax or whatever drug I can get my hands on because I have stockpiled fake pee for the UA's and pass the fuck out. On my days off it's just a blur of some type of intoxication. The beauty of this is, I'm no longer harming anyone, I tell my family I'm just dedicated to my career and they believe me because they see the new diesel (used 2011) Ford Dually I bought. I'm not in emotional pain for the lack of not having human interactions. My account is growing slowly but since I don't pay rent I can put almost half my monthly income into savings. I've written a list of the names of all the people I've hurt and for each name is a letter telling them everything that's beautiful about them. In 6 more months (if my body can hold up to my downers at night and daytime stimulants) I'll leave on a positive note with my dads debt paid off and my brother a newer truck which he should be able to make the payments on with the way I got the loan set up. Fuck you guys I'm so sorry I've failed you all. I was supposed to be the one to take every tear and change it for you... there has never been a time when my compassion didn't bring joy to someone's face, in fact that's the only thing that's kept me here this long. Kill me if you want and can find out who posted this, it would help. Today is January 7th.. late July and the toxic creature that has infected our existence as a species will enter the void of nothingness. Damnit, I was supposed to be something so beneficial. Anyway, bye babes. You have my love - mine is not to reason why, yours is not to make reply for I am to do and die.
#insanity #death #suicide #fear #addiction #abandonment #loss
My idiot sister in law got drunk at a party in June at her other sisters up in Pennsylvania. We were staying there for the weekend too for their daughters high school graduation and was flirting with her husband all night telling him that she was "gonna get you tonight!" when they went to bed later.
She got so drunk that she went in the wrong guestroom and gave me a blowjob,I had laid down because my back hurt and I was tired from the long drive, before she passed out drunk.
She's pretty, slim but is a drunk and at 33 she is starting to look older from all the boozing most likely.
She was calling me "Bill", her husbands name, and gave a helluva blowjob I have to admit.
I came in her mouth.
I didn't fuck her because she passed out but I probably would've if she'd stayed awake.
I doubt she even remembers giving the blowjob she was so drunk.
I never told my wife.
This probably the last place i wanted to say my mind. Im girl who is already 18 has no experience whatsoever its so shitty. I have lived in a strict household all through my life i have attended only girls private schools from elementary to high school which were all catholic. I was so happy to finally go to College then they gave me a gap year then when i finally go to college the Corona comes. Im the best definition of a virgin i Have never kissed a guy i still do not believe that still possible. I have many guys who are just friends even sneak out to go out but I come back a virgin. I dont even know whether im looking for a relationship or idk. Im open for any opinions...
After becoming suicidal, I stopped looking at it as a bad thing and believe some people deserve it.
You can tell people think Covid is over. People are talking to me again. So think some college aged females were talking to me about playing dodge ball or something. I’m old. But I just laughed and went with it. I enjoyed seeing happy people. Not sure why they included me.
I even got pulled into helping give a stranger guidance.
I’m just an approachable person. I look pretty & happy.
Once people get to know me they never want to see me again. I’m not mean. I’m weird. I can’t help it.
So I’m confiding to my best friend.
I have no friends. I do have 3 people who love me though.
I've been chatting with this guy for like 3 years. Well not everyday, like a few times every year. But the chat is like so intense and we talk all day long or late up all night about really interesting things.Even when he had a girlfriend, he would talk to me all day. (But not everyday) The 'HEART' emoji on snapchat would often appear next to our names( which indicates that both of us chat with each other the most among all the others). He laughs a lot at my jokes or stories. I think both of us enjoy whatever this chat-relationship we have. He was my senior in school. Since he has a
girlfriend and Also I kinda think he's not interested in me that way, I've never brought up anything that involves romance in our chats. Every time after our chat, I would feel different about him. I'd wonder if I like him. He keeps praising me a lot in many ways. But it's never really a sign...I think. Three days ago I chatted with him all night long again,and it went really well. This time I feel this crush stronger than ever. But if I do anything at all about it, I'll definitely loose whatever I have with him. I don't think I should. For one, I'm moving out of the country. Second, idk him that well, i just know he's sweet and I like him mainly cz he laughs at my jokes and praises me, We've never spoken face to face(we might have in school. I share my most embarrassing and funny stories with him. He said he even praised me among his friends saying that my social media feed is the realest. But I still don't think he's interested in me. But I'm really unable to get over him. Idk if he's still with his girlfriend. i can't ask him that cz that will give him the idea that I'm interested in him and that is why i wanna know if he's single.
My constant, sloth like state disgusts me. im a 17 year old male living in england currently and i hate myself. i hate my life. im constantly in a state of boredom, but im too lazy to do anything, im not at college because i cant be bothered having to try to achieve something, i was recently in a relationship with a girl who i thought i loved, but she wanted me to go out every day and i dont want to do that, im too lazy. i do not have a job, because i quite frankly cannot be arsed to go out and look. i dont know how to approach and talk to people in real life situations i spend most of my time playing games like league of legends to try and take my mind off of reality. i do nothing all day but eat, sleep and masterbate. sometimes i wish my family hated me, so i had a reason to feel so shit. i wish something traumatic happened to me as a child, i wish my parents abused me i wish a neighbor raped me or something to make me hate life, but no, my childhood was normal, i used to be normal. but now i cant stop this cycle of nothingness. i dont want to live, but i dont want to die. i dont want to die, i wish i had never been born in the first place. at least if i died and my family hated me then they would be happy i was gone, but they love me, and that makes existence so much harder. idk what im trying to say, i just wanted to vent. basically, im depressed, suicidal, and i dont have a reason for it which angers me to no end. im a disgusting waste of skin, im a waste of resources. im a disgusting human being. this life that was given to me by the lord, or whatever created us is being wasted. im a waste, why do i exist.
i am so so sorry for existing.
I have to confess something that (for me) is very embarrassing and horrible and bad.
I am so afraid of black people at night. I don't know why, I don't know when it started. When I'm out at night and I see a black person, I almost freak and pass out. It's horrible.
The worst part about it you ask? I am a black person myself.
Everytime i think of my ex bf, i felt horny and slutty. Now I am married and so does he but he used to sexually abused and pleased me. He took my virginity when i was only 15, at 16 i gave him my little tight hole and even let him fisted me once. I still remembered one time he fingered me at the club. We already broke up at that time and we met accidentally there. We started kissing, making out and i was wearing a short skirt that night and he ended up fingering me to orgasm on the couch. The thought of people seeing his hand in my panties and me cumming excited me so much. I even blow him one time in front of one of his friend and swallow his cum. i want to give him a buzz to have some fun again. Im so bad.
#infidelity #ex #slutty
Hi everyone. I am Sid. 23yrs old male. I live with my mom and maid in our apartment for the last 18 years. . Our maid has been working in our house for the last 9 years. She is almost 35yrs old, She is married.
Last year my mom was diagnosed with alzhiemers. Since then I have been doing all her work. I help her in every way possible. It's even become impossible for her to walk from one room to the other. Our maid and myself have to carry her from one place to the other. It's been a very difficult journey for me for the last few months.
Last week I had one of the most embarassing moments in my entire life. I had to carry my mom from the dining room to the bedroom. I was not wearing any clothes. I only had a towel wrapped around my waist. I lifted mom up in my arms and started walking towards the bedroom. Our maid was walking beside me just in case I needed any help. At one moment I felt my towel slipping off from my waist. And before I could do anything it fell off from my waist onto the floor. I was standing totally naked with my mom in my hands and my maid was staring at me.
I was so embarassed as I couldn't cover my body up myself. I asked the maid "Could you please cover me up quickly?". The maid bent down and picked up the towel trying not to look at me. She tried to wrap the towel around me but in vain. It was almost impossible as I was holding my mom in my arms. While the maid tried to cover me up ,her hand touched my penis a couple of times and it made my penis hard almost immediately.
When she was unable to cover me up with the towel after several attempts I told her "Let it be, Just follow me to the living room". I carried my mom to the living room and she followed. I was feeling so embarrassed and excited at the same time as I could feel my maid watching my bare body from behind. After I reached the room the maid helped me lay down my mom on the couch.
My mom however was totally unaware of what was going on. I then stood up and still naked walked out of the room and the maid followed me out.
As i walked out of the room my penis was so erect that i had to cover it with both my hands. As the maid came outside the room I stood there covering my penis , My face was so red ,I was looking down.
I said "sorry, I didn't drop my towel intentionally, please forgive me". I looked down at the floor as I was feeling so embarassed i couldn't look into her eyes. She came closer and said "Hey, it's not a big deal. I am married and I have a 9year old son. I see him naked everyday. Cheer up. "
I was so embarrassed that i could feel my body shivering. I was still standing totally naked in front of her with my hands covering only my penis. She saw that i was very embarassed as came closer and hugged me. I felt relieved and so i had to move my hands from my penis as I hugged her lightly. But her hug was such that my penis was pressed slightly on her body. I was so erect at that moment and was feeling very awkward.
After a few seconds of the hug I was feeling very uneasy and I couldn't control my body. I could feel the pressure inside my penis rising as her hand was lightly wrapped around my body. I never expected this to happen. Before I could say anything or even move away from her suddenly my body jolted and I spurted out 4 to 5 shots of cum on her clothes as I tried to move away from her. I let out a moan and fell to the ground, my penis was throbbing and ejaculating shots of cum, one after the other. I couldn't believe what was just happening. I was breathless. My body was shivering . My legs were shaking. It was as if some magic had happened.
"Oh my god, how did that happen?" she said." I didn't even touch your penis. When was the last time you masturbated?". I couldn't reply as I lay there on the floor.
Cum still dripping from my penis onto the floor. Her clothes were messed up. She went off to clean herself up while I lay there on the floor.
It is the most embarassing moment moment in my life and I hope it never happens with anyone else. Thank you.
#embarassed #maid #mom #naked #cum
We have two dogs and one cat. One of the dogs is awesome (I love him) the cat is meh (I’m not really a cat person) and the other dog however is a giant pain in the ass.
She pisses and shits in my office and pisses and shits in my outdoor kitchen. She adds no value, she sleeps all fucking day (like a cat), she hates going outside, she gets frequent ear infections that smell like sour ass and requires vet visits all the damn time.
My wife loves the dog. She’s had her since before we met. I love my wife more than anything but that dog is a nightmare.
If the dog could have an “accident” without it devastating my wife, that would be one dead ass dog TODAY.
I don't even know if I want forgiveness. But I find this overwhelming urge to confess. I can't keep it in. The father of my child admitted he still has feelings for me. It felt like I was in a dream. He was out of my life and our son's life for 11 years. We've made amends and we are all on good terms. But things have felt off. Weird. I get mixed signals from him. He told me today he is always happy to see me and he always looks forward to seeing me because he still has feelings for me. He never stopped. Then he dropped the real juggernaut: he wants to have sex with me. He thinks about it. I admitted I think about it, too. That's the part where I feel guilty. Well, the first part of it. I can't tell him no. I am dangerous when sex is involved. I'm a lust addict. I felt myself flushing with feelings of lust when he was talking to me. Thoughts and feelings were swirling around. All the fantasies I've had about him since he resurfaced were playing in my head. Him admitting feelings and that he wanted to have sex with me felt like a fantasy playing out in real time. He said he wasn't going to act on it, but then said no, he didn't trust himself either. And jokingly said "well, maybe" in regards to having an opportunity to act on his feelings. It was alluded to several times. Basically, if we at all had an opportunity, or wanted to create one, we could. We could cheat together. I have a boyfriend and he has a wife. I don't necessarily want to cheat on my boyfriend. It's not like a desire I have specifically. Just like he doesn't want to cheat on his wife and hurt her. But when it comes to me and lust--like I said, I'm dangerous. I don't trust myself. I couldn't say no. I don't know how to explain it. It's a familiar feeling. Being overtaken by lust and feeling like I'm not in control. I've dreamed about cheating "accidentally" and feeling the horrific shame of not being able to undo what I did, despite feeling devastated, feeling like I didn't act of my own will. That's what it has felt like in the past. Not being able to say no to someone because, well, I didn't want to say no. I can't separate the "want" from the "should". I shouldn't do it, but I want to. I shouldn't have this slice of cake, but I want it. I cannot deny myself that which I crave. He's a craving. I did not need him to tempt me, to exacerbate and amplify my feelings for him. Especially now that he resolved all the tension and mixed signals I was picking up, I don't have to wonder if he's being an asshole or if he's hot/cold to me because of whatever made up reason. It's all clear now. And what I'm picking up is that he's ready to throw down. If only we had a chance... I wonder if fantasizing about that moment will be enough to satiate my desire. Or if I will need to make it a reality.
I confess that after 30 minutes on this website, I can think of no sins to confess. Could I be more arrogant?
I hate my family. they're so mean and rude. they never care about me. my mom always beats me and yells at me and my stupid little brother learns from her. my dad is ok. I like my older sister and my two big brothers but my mom and my little brother are a pain. I just hate them.
My friend’s fiancé is loud, has an awkward laugh and is clearly in love with him. However she is honestly something of a butterface. As best you’d say she had a pretty plain face but she has a great pair of boobs, and I can’t help but wonder what she’s like in bed. She’s very geeky and has a fairly Christian background but I’ve got this feeling that she actually has a pretty filthy side.
It’s entirely on me but I can’t help imagining what it would be like to be deep inside her and feel her cumming hard on my cock. Tonight we were playing Cards Against Humanity and I kept picking sexual answers to her prompts to hear her ‘talk dirty’ and reference her pussy.
My partner and I have been together for 8 years and though the sex was great we haven’t done anything since Christmas due to medical reasons.
#fantasy #infidelity #lust #sex #attractive
I am married with kids. I have fantasies about impregnating (consensually) random women of many ages.
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